Phone conversation last night:
Mark: David and I have names for your children.
Me: What children?
Mark: Your unborn children.
Me: *heavy sigh* What are they?
Mark: Picky and Choosy.
He thinks I'm too finicky when it comes to the men I date, hence naming the children I will never have Picky and Choosy. And you know, maybe he's right, but I have not waited this long to settle.
But because I have a good and somewhat perverse sense of humor, I've decided to make these unborn children real. (In a fictional sense, of course.) So here they are... I've drawn pictures of them for you. Ladies and gentleman, please meet Picky and Choosy, my unborn children:
UPDATE: A chat with Laura about the above picture:
Laura: I love Picky's hair and mouth, but you can't tell she and Choosy are sisters.
Me: Choosy's a boy.
Laura: WHAT? No way. Why is he wearing a blue dress then?
Me: Because he's confused. He was born with unidentifiable sex organs.
Laura: No way.
Me: Yes. And you can't see it in the picture, but Picky has a second head coming out of her back.
Laura: Like a Siamese twin?
Me: Yes. It always backtalks her and makes her really angry.
Laura: They make me afraid to have children.