So I showed my grandpa the picture of Great Great Aunt Minnie today when I went to visit him, and as soon as he looked at it he shook his head.
"Oh... Aunt Minnie," he said. "She was an old maid."
"Yeah," I replied, "but why?"
"Well, she tried to be a nun but didn't make it."
"Why didn't she make it?"
"Because she was supposed to fast but couldn't."
"Why couldn't she?"
My grandpa thought about this for a moment and then said, "Because she liked to eat, I guess."
(I mean, does it get any better than this?)
"Grandpa," I said, after a bit. "Do you remember anything else about Aunt Minnie except that she was never married and liked to eat?"
He shook his head. "No... I mean, she liked to sit by the fire, but everyone did in Ireland because it was always so damn cold."
So, that's it, everyone... that's Aunt Minnie's legacy. She was never married, liked to eat, was rejected from the nunnery, and could occasionally be found sitting by the fire because Ireland was so damn cold. The end.