thir- twenty-nine years ago today, my mother gave birth to a beautiful baby girl, a lovely person you've come to know as... me.
To celebrate this joyous occasion, I've filled my day with a plenitude of activities, some of which I'd like to share with you.
The first thing I'm going to do today is... laundry! After that, I'm going to... call a cat sitter! Once those two things are completed, I might... vacuum! Finally, if I still have any energy left after all that, I'm going to go to dinner with my friends.
Thank you for your birthday wishes!
PS - Sorry about the above graphic ↑, Mom, but I thought it was funny.